When your child seems unhappy, it is tempting to find an activity that will cheer them up. Sometimes company helps. Sometimes the more useful response is to listen and take the worry seriously, without expecting their mood to change on demand.
If your child is in immediate danger
Call 999 if your child has seriously harmed themselves, taken an overdose or may act on suicidal thoughts now. Follow the call handler’s instructions. Do not wait for a website reply. NHS urgent advice on suicidal thoughts.
Notice changes without diagnosing
Persistent low mood or irritability, losing interest in usual activities, withdrawing from people, and changes in sleep or eating can be reasons to seek help. The NHS guide to depression in children explains possible signs. A list cannot tell you what is happening for your child.
Make it easier to talk
Choose a quiet moment. You could say: “You have seemed unhappy lately. Do you want to tell me what has been going on?” Give them time and avoid jumping straight to a solution. Something that seems small to an adult may feel enormous to a child.
If talking face to face is difficult, offer another way, such as writing something down. If they would rather talk to another trusted adult, support that choice. Do not treat it as a rejection of you.
Offer company without a demand to be happy
Ask whether they would like company, a familiar activity or some quiet time with you nearby. An invitation to make a snack together is different from insisting that a walk will fix how they feel. Keep ordinary care and routines going, adjusting expectations when they are struggling.
Get help for ongoing concerns
If you are worried about their wellbeing or think they may be depressed, arrange a GP appointment. You can also speak to their school about changes staff have noticed and available support. Local children’s mental health services and referral routes vary; do not assume a service in another area covers your child. NHS advice on getting help.
Ask for urgent clinical support if there are self-harm or suicide concerns, even without an immediate emergency. Tell the GP or existing care team what your child has said or done rather than describing it only as a bad mood.
Support your child can contact
Childline offers support for children and young people under 19. They can call 0800 1111 free or use its online support options. Explain that asking for help is allowed, including when they cannot yet find the words.
For your own support, see Dad Resources. For a related everyday issue, read avoiding comparisons between children.
Updated 10 September 2026. Sources used for the guidance are linked above.
Leave a Reply